Thursday, May 27, 2010

A Rose By Any Other Name...

...is not a rose.

I read or heard once before that telemarketers and customer service representatives randomly select names to use for each call. It's like a game: pretend to be someone else and then you don't personalize any potential abuse thrown at you as a result of less-than-satisfied customers. 

I'm not surprised to find out it's true.  After all, I know the folk I routinely call about my mortgage would never want me to get ahold of their real identities.  Then, they'd be accountable for the information they share, the tone they take, and the cruel and ill-thought-out comments they make. 

It's how I discovered the name game was true that is a bit... well, odd.

I called Adobe's customer service line hoping to get my Photoshop CS5 order expedited.  I did order it April 15 and it is now May 27, right?
The back story: The first time I placed the order, I had to verify that I was an educator.  So, I used my handy cell phone camera to shoot my badge and sent it in.  This confirmed that I was who I said I was.  Then I waited excitedly for the official release.  The download trial released somewhere around May 12 or so and I couldn't wait to download the product.  I got an e-mail saying my disc was en route.  But alas, there was no disc coming to me, because somewhere between April 15 and May 15, the order went from "pending" to "timed out".  Huh?

And today:
A pleasant voiced gentleman with a slight Asian accent answered the phone and said "Thank you for calling Adobe's Customer Service this is Sam."

I explained my troubles.  He put me on hold to talk to the sales team. He returned for more information from me.  He put me on hold to talk to the sales team. He returned to say he'd call PayPal (who I used to send payment rather than share my credit information) and then call me back in an hour.  I said ok.

And he said, "Ok, then.  That's it for now.  I'll call you back at the number you provided me.  Once again, this is T.J., and thank you."

Wait... where'd TJ come from?   I thought I was speaking with Sam.  Hmm, I think he was on one hold too many and had an identity crisis.  I hope he finds himself before he calls me with the latest update...


I hear Disney's park workers do the same thing with name tags.  And you know, I can't help but wonder if waiters pull from the name bucket, too.  Maybe that's why the good folk working the table never seem to answer when you call for their assistance?
kids

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